When cheating
becomes the norm
By Leanna Landsmann
Q: My daughter Amanda says that her friend routinely cheats on tests and
just got an A on a paper her cousin wrote. My daughter doesn't want to rat her
out and tells me most of her friends think cheating is no big deal. I don't want
Amanda to ever think cheating is OK. Should I tell the school?
A: Academic
cheating in high school is widespread. Dr. Donald McCabe, Rutgers University,
studied 25,000 high school students from 2001 to 2008 and discovered that 90 percent
said they had cheated or plagiarized. His research shows that boys and girls in
every demographic group cheat even though most believe it is wrong. Today, unfortunately,
cheating is part of the high school status quo. If students think it's wrong,
why do they cheat? Dr. Jason Stephens, an expert on adolescent moral development
at the University of Connecticut, believes that the strongest predictor of cheating
isn't so much what students learn at home as it is "moral disengagement,
or the extent to which a student tends to disengage or neutralize personal responsibility
for his or her behavior by displacing onto others," such as teachers and
peers at school. Stephens says this is a "a corrosive force." Stephens
believes that honesty and integrity are not only values but habits. When these
habits are learned at home and strongly encouraged in school settings, cheating
will decrease. He is studying whether school honor codes and positive peer pressure
can influence students to do the right thing. How can you help Amanda do
the right thing? Marissa Gehley, a Burbank, Calif., counselor and founder of Kids
Need Our Wisdom, says, "Seize the moment! "When your child brings
up an important topic like cheating for discussion, it presents two great opportunities.
The first is to learn how Amanda feels about what her friend is doing," says
Gehley. The second is a chance to talk about the concepts of ethics, trust,
integrity and personal responsibility in an actual situation. Young people really
do think about the values and lessons that family and schools teach. But they
need "real life" opportunities to reinforce their knowledge, says Gehley.
"These real-life examples help them practice these values as well, as you
talk about what her friend is doing and why it's wrong." Gehley suggests
broadening the discussion. For example, what is a parent's role in homework? What's
the line between helping a student and actually doing the work? It sounds
like Amanda knows that cheating is wrong. What she may be struggling with is what
to do with the information, says Gehley. "She seems to want figure out how
to share her personal ethics with her friend without damaging the friendship." You
might model how that conversation could go, says Gehley. Discuss how she can let
her friend know her own beliefs about cheating, without expressing harsh judgment,
yet staying true to her personal values. "I call this Diplomacy 101,"
says Gehley. "Sometimes teens find it useful to focus on curiosity. For example,
'I'm wondering why you're letting someone else do your for you when you're really
smart'. This is also a great opportunity for Amanda to be a 'quiet' role model." Research
shows that cheating drops in schools that have honor codes and encourage a culture
of integrity. If Amanda's high school doesn't have an explicit policy and reward
students who follow it, now is a good time to get them to craft one. "Recent
economic and civic problems have eroded public trust," says Gehley. "It's
a great time for schools and families to beef up their emphasis on core values
and show why it's important to follow the Golden Rule." Do you have
a question about your child's education? E-mail it to Leanna@aplusadvice.com.
Leanna Landsmann is an education writer who began her career as a classroom teacher.
She has served on education commissions, visited classrooms in 49 states to observe
best practices, and founded Principal for a Day in New York City. Copyright
2009, United Feature Syndicate, Inc.
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